Babysitter Instructions: How to Leave Notes Your Sitter Will Actually Read

Most parents leave their babysitter too much information, not too little. Three pages on a phone screen, skimmed once, are impossible to find when a toddler is screaming, and the milk won’t warm. Good babysitter instructions do the opposite. They put the few things that matter where the sitter can find them fast, they match the details to your child’s age, and they follow how you already parent, so the sitter makes the calls you would make.

Below is how to write them, plus a template you can print and reuse.

Start here: the 5 things a sitter must know

If the sitter reads only five lines, make them these:

1. How to reach you, and one backup adult who can step in.
2. Your emergency number and home address, written out in full.
3. Allergies, medicines, and what a reaction looks like.
4. Sleep basics: how and where your child sleeps.
5. One line on how your child shows they are upset.

Everything else goes in a folder or a phone note: where the spare clothes and broom live, snack and screen limits, the full daily routine. That column of detail matters. It just does not belong on the front page. Mixing “emergency contact” with “she likes the blue cup” is how the emergency contact gets lost.

Between work, dinner, and getting everyone out the door, nobody has time to write sitter notes from scratch, so we designed this one-page sheet for you; download it free below.

Instructions for a sitter: The one-page rule

Put the must-knows on one visible page, either on the fridge or in the sitter’s hand, and keep the rest in a folder or a shared phone note. In a real emergency, people panic and forget basics like their own address. The critical lines have to be findable in three seconds, not buried in paragraph four.

Write your address and phone number out in full on that page. If the sitter has to call for help, they can read it straight to the operator instead of trying to recall it under stress.

Emergency information for your sitter

Write the right emergency number for where you live. Your sitter may not be local, and may not know it.

If your country is not listed, write your own local number on the sheet. Across Europe, 112 reaches emergency services from any phone, and it works on mobiles in many other countries too.

Also leave your mobile and your partner’s, one backup adult in case they can’t reach you, your child’s doctor, and your local poison line. In the United States, that is 1-800-222-1222; for UK the number is 0344 892 0111.

Tell the sitter plainly when to call emergency services before calling you. For example: if your child can’t breathe, doesn’t respond, or has a severe allergic reaction. Panic wastes seconds. A written rule removes the hesitation.

Allergies and medication: a real action plan

Don’t just name the allergy. Say what a reaction looks like and what to do, because a sitter who has never seen one won’t recognise it. For daily medicine, write the exact dose and the exact time. Then add one rule that protects everyone: give no medication without checking with you first, unless it is the emergency allergy plan above.

Choking: what changes by age

Choking is a leading cause of death among young children, and most children who die from choking are under five. If you have a child under four, prepare clear instructions for the sitter in advance, for example, save a short first-aid video they can easily access.

Babysitter instructions: Nice-to-know by your child’s age

This is the nice-to-know detail, the part that keeps the evening smooth but won’t cause a crisis if the sitter misses a line. How much you write depends on how old your child is. A baby needs everything spelled out, because they can’t explain themselves. An older child fills in the gaps on their own. Match the detail to the age below, and skip whatever doesn’t apply.

• Baby (under about 1 year): feeding (how much, how to warm a bottle, how long milk is safe once warmed), the nap ritual step by step, how they settle themselves, and the safe-sleep setup you follow). A baby can’t tell the sitter what is wrong, so detail matters most here.
• Toddler (about 1 to 3 years): the meal (or detailed meal preferences and food routines), nap and bed order, the exact bedtime ritual (“two books, then the nightlight, then goodnight; she may protest, and that’s normal”), the comfort object, and the words that work when they are melting down; clothing size and what to pack for outings; friends’ names and playdate preferences.; favorite toys and books.
• Preschooler (about 3 to 5 years): they can talk now, so tell the sitter what your child can do alone, the screen-time limit, and how bedtime really goes (the stalling, the “one more”). Give the sitter room to bend: “One story is the rule, but a second is fine tonight.”  A few everyday details can also make things easier for the sitter e.g. friends’ names and playdate preferences, favorite toys, books, or comfort items, (detailed) meal preferences and food routines; or clothing sizes and what to pack for outings
• More than one child: details from above and who goes to bed first, who needs more help, and where they will test the sitter (“they’ll say they’re allowed dessert before dinner; they are not”).
• A child with additional needs (autistic, neurodivergent, or otherwise): write more, not less, and write it plainly. Name the things that soothe your child and the things that set them off, because a sitter has no way to guess. Say which sensory triggers to avoid (a loud toy, a scratchy label, the bright hallway light), how your child communicates when words are hard (pointing, a picture card, a particular sign), and the exact routine that must not change, since a skipped step can turn a calm evening upside down.
  If your child uses a communication device or app, or a visual schedule, show the sitter how it works before you leave. Keep each note concrete. “If he covers his ears, the room is too loud, so move somewhere quieter” lands better than “he gets overwhelmed sometimes.”

Babysitter notes: What’s unique about your child

A  parent’s biggest worry usually isn’t the fire extinguisher. It’s something much harder to put on a page: whether the sitter will really understand their child. So give the sitter the decoder:

• What it looks like when your child is upset, tired, or overwhelmed, and what actually helps. The particular comfort toy, a quiet room, a snack, a minute left alone.
• The exact phrase that lands. “When she cries at drop-off, say: Mummy always comes back.”
• What to ignore, and what to act on. Some children fuss for two minutes and settle. Some don’t.

Keep it to one line per point, not an essay. This is the part that makes a sitter feel like they know your child instead of guessing.

How your sitter can handle big feelings & limits

If you parent in a particular way, tell the sitter, or your child gets two sets of rules in one evening. That is confusing for them and stressful for everyone. Keep it to what the sitter will actually meet in a few hours:

• For a big feeling, we name it. You’re really frustrated. Then we stay close. We don’t send them to their room or threaten to leave.
• When they push a limit: “Hold the limit calmly and offer a choice. You can walk to the bath, or hop there like a frog. You pick.“
• What we don’t do: say it in plain words. No shouting, no “I’m leaving without you,” no sweets as a bribe, whatever your own lines are.

Write these in your own words. A sitter who repeats your actual phrases keeps the evening feeling like home

The grey zone: handle it, text, or call?

Sitters freeze on the in-between moments, the ones that are neither an emergency nor part of the routine. Give them a simple map e.g.:

Then give your default: “For anything not on here, use your judgement. I trust you. When in doubt, text.”

Safety & visitors: Important notes for your babysitter

The rest of safety is about people and access. Spell out three things: who may take your child, who may come to the door, and whether they leave the house at all.

• Who may collect your child. Name exactly who is allowed to pick up or take your child, and say clearly that no one else may, even someone who seems familiar. If there is a separated-parent or custody situation, be specific: “If [name] comes to the door, do not hand the children over. Call me at once.” A sitter can’t hold a boundary they were never told about.
• Unexpected visitors. Tell the sitter what to do if someone knocks. “You don’t have to open the door. They can come back later.” And flag anyone you do expect: “My sister may drop off a dish around six. She won’t stay.”
• Leaving the house and driving. Say whether the sitter may take your child out at all. If driving is allowed, check they have a correctly fitted car seat and know your rules. If it is not allowed, say so plainly.

House rules for babysitters

These are the small, everyday rules of your home. None of them is an emergency, but a sitter who knows them upfront won’t have to guess or text you about each one. Keep it short and specific to your house:

• Rooms and areas. Anywhere out of bounds, such as a home office, a nursery you’d rather keep dark, or the stairs without a gate.
• The front door and locks. Whether it stays locked, where a spare key is, and what to do if they step into the garden.
• Pets. How to handle the dog at the door, who feeds the cat, which animal the toddler shouldn’t chase.
• Tidy-up. What you’d like done before you’re back (toys away, dishes rinsed), and what you honestly don’t mind leaving.
• The tiny house things. Shoes off indoors, the alarm code, how the heating works. Obvious to you, invisible to them.

Write only the rules that fit your home. A sitter would rather have five clear ones than twenty vague ones.

Getting your child ready

A child who has met the sitter beforehand settles faster. If you can, set up a short overlap before you leave. Then let your child help build the sheet. Ask them what the sitter should know about their favourite game or their bedtime song, and write it in their own words. It gives an anxious child a sense of control, and it gives the sitter an instant way to connect.

Say goodbye clearly and go. A long, drawn-out goodbye makes it harder, not easier.

 Instructions for First-time sitter vs. regular sitter

The sheet you built works for any sitter. What changes is how much of it you hand over, and that comes down to how well they already know your child.

• First time: leave the full sheet. The emergency block, the routine, the feelings, the grey-zone map, and who may collect. Over-explain the safety parts.
• Regular sitter: They know your child by now, so your note only needs what has moved since last time: a new allergy, a dropped nap, whatever this week’s bedtime battle is. A line on the fridge does more than a page they already know by heart.

When the sitter is a grandparent

This is the one sitter you can’t just hand a rulebook to. They raised you, and they raised you fine, so a page of instructions can read as a page of corrections.Instead, keep it simple: write down three non-negotiable rules that grandparents need to follow.

Where to keep the babysitter instructions

Instructions are only useful if the sitter can actually find them when something goes wrong. Put the one-page essentials somewhere obvious and easy to reach e.g. by the fridge. Keep the longer version in a clearly labelled folder or a shared note on your phone that you can update whenever you need to. Before you leave, show the sitter where both are.

Print the fillable version

Everything above works best when it’s filled in for your child and stuck on the fridge. Grab the printable Babysitter Instructions template — an editable, age-aware sheet with the emergency block, routine, feelings, grey-zone map and who-can-collect section ready to complete in five minutes. →

FAQ

How much should I write for a two-hour evening out?

The must-knows plus the grey-zone map. Skip the full routine narrative — for a short evening, “how to reach me, allergies, bedtime, how she shows she’s upset” covers it.

What if I don’t have time to write it all before I leave?

Fill the emergency block and the five must-knows only. That’s the safety floor.

Should I make my child follow every rule exactly with the sitter?

The safety rules, yes. For routine, tell the sitter where flexibility is fine — a slightly later bedtime won’t undo anything, and rigid instructions are harder to follow well.

My child gets very upset when I leave — what do I put?

One line on what the distress looks like, one line on what helps, and the exact reassuring phrase you use. Tell the sitter it’s normal and usually passes within a few minutes of you being gone.

Additional resources

• Choking Prevention for Babies & Children: What Every Parent Needs to Know